Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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