Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
