I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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