you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
