What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Randomize
