I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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