How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
