im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
