I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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