I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
