Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
they're like a gay fantastic four
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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