i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
