She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
