what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
