I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm drive I can fine osifer
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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