Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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