Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Randomize
