I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
