i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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