:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My breasts were aching with rage.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
