My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
