I must be too annoying 4 u.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
