I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
