U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
