he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
