I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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