Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
