If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
