I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
