on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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