another moral hangover. fuck.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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