I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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