In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
