Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
