I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Houston, we have a blender
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
The Olympian is in my bed
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
