It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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