it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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