Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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