Pants 0. Shit 1.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
