Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
