You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
