forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize