If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Randomize
