new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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