Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
