he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
