I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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