U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Mom said you looked used
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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