you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize