we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
